Thursday, July 14, 2011

Let's Talk About Vaginas

I was flipping through Cosmo the other day with my best friend and her cousin (he is a boy... so I would just like to apologize for having to listen to our conversation at this time) and we came across an ad for a tampon alternate. (Aside for my male readers: I'm sorry... I do not have sufficient knowledge about penises... peni?... what is the plural of penis?... anyway, I guess you could always read this and learn more about your girlfriend.)

The advertisement was for a new product called SoftCup. It's pretty self explanatory, but my mind still said, "what the ef?" in copious amounts when I saw this advertisement. It is a cup that you stick up your vah-jay-jay during your moon time.
The three of us just stared at the Cosmo in front of us wondering what we were going to do with the knowledge that had just entered our lives. I can't remember who began talking first, but once we began discussing the schematics of this product, things just became more confusing for the three of us. We sat on the couch and discussed everything from how the heck you are supposed to get it in, how it words and how you can supposedly have sex while wearing it. After a few minutes we went back to our real lives where tampons are the thing guys are afraid of, not cups.

It's been a few days since the incident and I'm still thinking about this product. I mean sure, these little cups kind of sound nicer than fiberglass or make-shift diapers, but I still don't know what to think about this alternative special time product. I decided to look around the blogs and see if anyone else was talking about this and sure enough, other women on the internet are weirded out by this thing as well.

One of my favorite blogs, hipstercrite, did some research on other vagina friendly products. One of the things she found that I found remarkable was a uterus pillow.

Well, isn't this just a lovely picture. Honestly, who doesn't want to cuddle up with some friendly fallopian tubes? I know I do. I mean, nothing says come hither to my bed like a giant uterus. I just know that there is some vagina lover out there that has their room decorated with uterus pillows. If you want to see more of the weird things people have made with vagina themes, go check out her blog. They are pretty hilarious.

So what is to come of this post? Honestly, I don't really know. I really think I just wanted to express my my worry for a society that makes vagina pillows. Note to my friends: I do NOT want a vagina pillow for Christmas. 


ClevelandPoet said...

as I read this my friend ( a girly) called me up and I answered it with "there are cups you all put in your lady bits during your period!" and she was all uhmm...

also uterus pillow=awesome

jewel said...

ClevelandPoet: I was so shocked as well!! Honestly, what has our world come to?!

I still haven't made up my mind about the uterus pillow. Part of me says, OH MY GOD YES. The other part is curled up in a corner crying. However, my close friend's comedy troupe wears vaginas on their head for a song they do and I think it's awesome... so I suppose uterus pillow and I could come to terms.

Anonymous said...

ummm lol have u every heard of the Diva Cup? *sigh* you Montanans are also so behind, lol. "vagina cups" are known to greatly decrease menstrual pain. if you have cramps and use tampons, switch from a tampon to a soft cup and you will probably feel a difference. the famous Diva Cup is a much better option, though, since it is re usable, making it earth friendly.

jewel said...

We really are so behind!!! haha. I'm glad to hear a positive review of this contraption though and am definitely pro earth friendly. I may need to check out the Diva cup. Thanks for letting me know about it!